(Skip to the bottom if you don't want to read a bunch of bitchin' and moaning.
Bear with me while I rant for a minute.
I've spent the last 2 days going through piles and actually filing away the various bills, bank statements, school notices and foreclosure letters. My cell phone started making that beep that sounds exactly like the smoke alarm. (Believe me, I figured that one out the hard way.)So, all I have to do is find the charger and my umbilical cord is back up and running, right? Hah! Kitchen drawer--not here. Next to iPod charger--nope. Drawer full of safety scissors, pencil sharpeners, rulers and scotch tape--getting colder. OK, let's try to the box from hell....
This is the charger graveyard. There are chargers for the remote controlled trucks, the regenerator cars, the air puck, my Cat in the Hat remote controlled car, my lost Palm Pilot, and some headsets from American Airlines thrown in. There is a Motorola charger but it won't work on my phone. The boys have their GameBoy chargers neatly placed next to the outlets in their rooms(the only evidence of logical thinking in that department).
I live in a house where the organizing policy is:
"Don't Ask Mary Where To Put Things, and for God's sake, Don't Tell Mary Where They Are." Grrrrrrrrrrrr. I would like to microchip everything, even my kids, and get a GPS.
I started my Sunrise Circle Jacket and have just gotten past the hem join on the back:
I've placed markers for the darts and that's about it. This is knitted with Brown Sheep Kaleidoscope, color 'Anaheim,' a discontinued yarn that I had to bid for on three different lots on ebay. So, three different times over 2 weeks, I had to go through the ordeal of outlasting the poor sod/soddette who was bidding against me. I ended up paying about the same price per skein as when I originally bought it, woohoo. Let this be a warning: Don't dream up new projects based on one skein leftover from something you knitted years ago. It leads to google searches and ebay and untold stress because now you see that sweater made in that yarn and no other yarn will do. But, hey, I'm loving it!
One last goodie from Japan
Aren't they cute and slightly evil? They're thread snips but I like to think of them as my "Shockheaded Peter" thumb cutters. Boy, I am just full of piss and vinegar today. Must be that time of the month.
Well, since I'm feeling so bitchy I'm going to lay into the prom dresses from Bloomingdale's. Well, only one since Blogger is being fussy(must be catching). Soooo, for $388 you can pre-empt your date's hurling by wearing this snappy number in the exact same shade as his vodka-and-lime Gatorade vomit with a few green apple Jolly Ranchers thrown in for added depth and tone. There's another for $99 that makes you look exactly like a chaperone--great camouflage for when you're sneaking out to the parking lot for a quick snog in the limo.
Why am I even doing this? My senior prom stank. It was at the Blackstone Hotel in downtown Ft. Worth, a ratty old hotel that was just days from being condemned. I spent the evening with my boyfriend looking for his best friend's date. She had wandered off to a debutante party on another floor and learned a new phrase, "Open Bar." She managed to knock back a million vodka tonics in the space of 30 minutes before hanging all over some guy when we found her. One image that sticks in my mind is sitting my boyfriend's Corvair, grimly drinking bourbon and Dr. Pepper, and thinking "Get me the hell outta here!"
Hoooookay, now that I've gotten that off my chest it's time to lighten up.
Today I'm going throw out some trivia questions based on the useless knowledge that rattles around in my brain.
1. What's the mascot of the Hull City football team?
2. Kilometer zero is where in France?
3. What's the name of my friend Catherine's ex-husband and current spouse of Eileen Rosenzweig? hint: his book is subtitled "Confessions of a Toxic Bachelor."
4. Kaffe Fassett lives in London but grew up where? What's the name of the famous hotel nearby where Orson Welles once spent a honeymoon?
5. Kirstie Alley was this on Star Trek before gaining notoriety as a 'fat actress.' What was she? extra point: her ex-husband was best known for what TV series?
6. I once taught knitting at a birthday party for Shaquille O'Neal's youngest son. What's his name?
7. You can make instant volvanoes by mixing baking soda and what in a pop bottle?
8. How many touchdowns did Vince Young make in the Rose Bowl? And just how many did Matt Leinart make? Hah!
9. Puffy Ami Yumi did a remake of this song for a cartoon series. Which song? Which series?
10. Where in the blazes is my cell phone charger?